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Girl Who Thinks She’s Doing Porn Actually Just Joined Roller Derby Team



Daiseigh Morris couldn’t believe her luck when she got a call back to audition for “An all-girl group. Must be able to do own makeup, supply skimpy outfits, and come up with skanky pseudonym.” Morris had never been in a porno flick before, unless you count the homemade stuff she made with her college boyfriend, but she was ready to flaunt her body for the camera, in any position they wanted.


“I showed up in my sluttiest outfit, which included a mesh crop top, fishnet tights, and not much else. They told me to come to this old unused armory which I thought was kinda weird, but I figured it was going to be an artistic film. The woman who let me in took one look at me and handed me a pair of roller blades, telling me to put them on. I thought it was kinda weird but I just went with it.”


Before she knew it, Morris was lined up with a group of other rough and tumble girls skating around the space and pushing into each other. “It was all hot and I was into it, but I was confused about when we were going to stop and get to the orgy scene.”


Turns out Morris had mistakenly joined a roller derby team. “It’s fun and I’ve really connected with most of the girls. I just wish I picked a better name than Regina Firecrotch.”