Three Hairstyles that Eh, Just Put On A Hat
Styling your hair is a must-do, whether it's an updo or a down-do. (I'm so cute). But really…you? Okay, but you're not going to like...
top of page
Loosely Cited Wellness
Makeup Tips for When You’re Being Filmed Berating the Sales Clerk
It’s so important to put people in their place, and remind them how to do their job. Is it my fault that I’m just a full-time mom trying...
I Made a Mud Mask with Dirt from an Ancient Burial Ground and Now My Face is Haunted
My friend Jehsyka told me one day my face was looking like trash. She told me about a place I could go and get FREE mud to clear up my...
I Forgot to Blend My Contouring and Was Mistaken for a Native American Ghost!
It happens to us all. We forget things on our way out the door, like our coffee, our phone, our kids. As a reporter on the go, this...
How to Achieve Super Soft Skin by Making a Blood Sacrifice to a Demon God. Results Within Hours!
In these hot summer months, your skincare is so important, and so is keeping the demonic forces around you satisfied. Here are some tips...
Introducing The Glowt’s New Makeup Line: Feaügh Fase
A makeup designed specifically for you, and everyone else. Made from the finest herbs and oils from one of those blood diamond countries....
Beauty Tips to Hide the Dead Emptiness in Your Eyes
Being a human is an incredible burden. We toil and worry our days away, waiting for the inevitable end. This can break our spirits and...
Summer Hairstyles You'll Give Up On and Just Put in a Bun
It’s summer and that means not only do we have to be obsessed with our bodies, but we also have to be obsessed with our hair. Even if...
Four Beauty Products We Love that Cost More than Your Rent
At The Glowt, we love to show you products you wish you could have but definitely will never afford. We know you appreciate us letting...
Want a Kardashian Ass? Inject Fat from Your Brain into Your Butt!
There's too much fat in your brain. Who needs all that up there? It's weighing your head down and making you think too much. Now we all...
How Bathing in Virgin’s Blood Became the Hot New Trend Everybody’s Talking About!
Maybe you’re aging prematurely from all the stressful world traveling you’re doing, or maybe your skin doesn’t feel as great from all the...
Lose Those Laugh Lines By Getting Offended by Everything
It's something we all fear: getting old and ugly. Wrinkles are one big part of becoming unattractive and thus unmarriable. If you have...
The Chemical Peel that's ALL Chemical and NO Peel
We know your face could use a lift. Instead of going under the knife, try our new organic chemical peel. It is full of dubious sounding...
Our Latest Product Drop: SNK Oil
All-natural.* Dermatologist recommended.* SNK Oil is infused with Vitamins S, N, and K and something called cyclotetrasiloxane, which we...
We Gave Our Exploited and Exhausted Bangladeshi Factory Worker a Makeover!
And she still completed a full 16-hour shift afterwards. And didn't complain when we docked her $1.20 hourly pay for the time we took to...
I Tried Gua Sha and Now My Face Looks Like a Thumb
As a woman in her twenties, I am constantly reminded of the inevitable aging process my pore-free, nubile skin will soon go through....
The No Makeup Makeup Routine for Girls Who Don’t Need Makeup
Cover your face with olive oil and call it a day, girl. Work the natural light!
An Easy 19-Step Process to “Bedroom Eyes”
1. Wash your face with your favorite organically-made vegan cleanser 2. Pat face dry and glance in mirror. Uh oh, that unibrow’s ever so...
The Five Best Natural Sunscreens That Are Paraben-Free and Not Gonna Protect Shit
As the weather warms up, you may be spending most of your days outside and that means more exposure to the sun. Chemical sunscreens may...
bottom of page